New stock market terms for 2008 and beyond...

Stock Analyst -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock. Stock Split -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves. Financial Planner -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected. Market Correction -- The day after you buy stocks. Cash Flow-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet. Yahoo -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share. Windows -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share. Institutional Investor -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse. Profit -- An archaic word no longer in use (By Rodrigo P).